We all wish these 3 April fool’s stories were actually real. Whatever you’re doing today, don’t believe a word anyone says. All that’ll happen is you’ll find out you’ve been told a load of nonsense. We’ve have been looking around the web to find some lies that have been told – would you think these are fakes?
1. The Drunk Lock
We all know that trying to fit your key into the keyhole when you’re trying to get home is a nightmare. But when you’re drunk, it’s even worse. This is why Ironmongery Direct have created the ‘Drunk Lock’.
When you’ve had a few too many pints, or been persuaded to have a few shots, this would be the best thing that’s happened to you. The curved edges at the top allow for you to slide your key into the hole.
The marketing director at Ironmongery has officially said this: “The Night Lock is proving to be by far the most in demand product in our range and it’s not even available to buy yet.”
No more embarrassing meetings with your postman as you’re handed your post in the mornings!
2. Groupon’s dog talking lessons
Groupon are renowned for their epic deals, which we are all looking out for before heading out for a pizza. But now, you’ll see a new button on the menu bar – and you’re going to need all the savings you can get, just so you can start ordering your dog around!
By the end, you are going to be able to ask your dog to bring you your slippers with: “Bring me my slippers now, slave dog.” And “If you don’t stop yapping I’ll drive you to a kennel 58 miles from here and never return”.
Husbands will be sighing with relief after now it’ll be the dogs getting these orders. What if you don’t have a dog? Don’t worry – Groupon’s offering 75% off all dogs when you order this course.
3. Tesco’s NEW bouncy aisles
For toddlers who’ve had endless hours of fun sliding along the aisles after pushing the trolley, we’ve got something even better! Tesco have said that they will add the ‘Spring Stepper Shelf Solution’ alongside all the shelves. This will allow those who are slightly shorter to jump up and grab the top shelf product.
Even Tesco’s new director of aisle operations has said: “bouncy aisles is both a practical and fun solution” which means that even those of us who are tall enough, can still enjoy our shopping trips. Does this mean next year Tesco will be raising the roofs of all stores so we don’t bang our heads?
Oh wait – who says these were ever really revealed today?